2005 BA in Philosophy with Concentration in Bioethics and Taoism

2005 Training in Zen Buddhism under Adhyashanti (lineage of Arvis Joen Justi, Taizan Maezumo Roshi, and Jakusho Kwong)

2006 Ashtanga Yoga Teacher Certification from the Yoga Kingdom Sanctuary in CA (Lineage of Paramahamsa Yogananda, and Babaji)

2007 Training in Kriya Yoga from the Self Realization Fellowship (lineage of Paramahamsa Yogananda, and Babaji)

2009 Training and Certification (in 2012) in Sri Shakti Healing and Meditation from the Shiva Sai Mandir in Andhra Pradesh, India (lineage of Sri Kaleshwar, Shirdi Said Baba, Paramahamsa Yogananda, and Babaji)

2014 Began a seven year mentorship as a submissive under the care of one specific male dominant who trained me in BDSM

2016 Began a four year mentorship as a dominatrix under the guidance and supervision of the same male dominant

2021 Dr. Joe Dizpenza Intensive and Progressive Courses

2022 ‘Science and Practice of Heart Coherence’ course from Heart Math Institute and Rollin McCraty PhD

2023 Dr. Joe Dizpenza Progressive Course for Personal Transformation

2024 Colette Pervette Shadow Series Dominatrix Training

• Nonviolent Communication (NVC) process created by Marshall B. Rosenberg, Ph.D

• Blueprint for Pleasure created by Jaiya

• “Existential Kink: Unmask Your Shadow and Embrace Your Power” by Carolyn Elliott Ph.D

• Kasia Urbaniak (trained for 17 yrs to be a Taoist nun while working as a successful Dominatrix in NYC)

• Byron Katie and her teachings

• Gangaji and her teachings

• Krishnamurti and his teachings

I began to experience the need for consent and boundaries when I began to train in kink and BDSM as a submissive. Then when I began to train with professional dominatrices as a Fem Domme, I began to learn more deeply about how to work with boundaries and consent as a dominant in a D/s power exchange. Consent to me is a full yes one person gifts another.

Consent is not a one time thing, but rather an ongoing / dynamic / intrinsic / reciprocal part of any interpersonal relationship that desires to grow and mature in a sustainable way through time and shared experiences.

I find that clear communication (verbal and nonverbal) and self-awareness are essential for establishing consent, revisiting it t later times, and navigating boundaries within power-based dynamics.

Consent helps create a grounding in real safety, trust, and care for both people. Someone’s experience of what they wish to consent to might expand, or shift directions over time and for this reason consent for me also includes the need to be in real connection with others and be a very good listener through which to understand the needs and boundaries of those we are in connection with.

Consent is part of the first conversation I have with any potential client to ensure we share the same understanding of what consent means to each of us and that our understandings and expressions of consent are in alignment.

Before I work with a prospective client I meet with them for free on zoom for 20 minutes. During this time we go over what they wish to experience during their session and what they feel their primary needs and desires are as well as what their personal boundaries and hard nos are. I then share with them my own personal boundaries which include that I am not a sex worker, nor engage in any form of body fluid exchange and keep my clothes on during the session. If I feel we are a good fit, we then confirm what the session will entail in terms of experiences and go over my framework for consent outlined here to ensure we are in alignment with our understanding of consent. I only scheduled sessions when I feel we have established clear expectations. 

Before the start of the first session, I have the client choose two safe words to use any time we are in session - one safe word for when they are getting close to a personal limit and need for the session to be redirected and another safe word for then they have gotten to a personal limit and need for the session to stop and for us to check in. If a client shows any sign of distress, tension, or unease during the session and have not used their safe words, I still check in and ask for their feedback to ensure they are doing ok to continue and that I do not cross a personal boundary they may not have named before, but might be learning about in real time. 

Throughout the session I am also careful for when a client is saying yes, but their body seems contracted or I feel fear or hesitation coming from them and in these cases I check in on how they are feeling. I also encourage clients throughout the session to give feedback real time in terms of how they are are doing mentally, emotionally, energetically, and physically so that they grow the ability to be discerning and communicate a need as it arises. Whenever a client expresses any form of distress or unease, I check in and we revisit if the scope of what they have consented to has changed through asking clarifying questions until we both feel ok to continue with the session. 

The power dynamics I work with are based in reciprocity, mutual respect, active listening, ability to vocalize needs, and clear shared understanding and consent. I do not establish power over someone, but rather a relationship of collaboration (power ‘with’) and allows for the client to trust both in me as well as in themselves to go deeper into kinks and taboos in a manner that feels safe and supportive to them.

If a client attempts to cross a boundary I have established during our initial meeting prior to the session, I verbally name this and see how they respond. If they are unwilling to course correct then I stop the session all together (and include this in my policies).

My experience is that personal boundaries and limits can change or evolve over time and so I am a big advocate of developing self-awareness as a tool for navigating shifts in power dynamics and nagivating potential triggers and emotional reactions that can arise.